I’m pretty open with you here on the blog. Often as I’ve bared my soul and pushed the publish button, the butterflies in my stomach turned to some kind of winged monster that tried to carry me off.
Being vulnerable isn’t something that comes easy to me and I have a feeling I’m not the only one. Yet one of the things I really learned through this process of writing is that when we put ourselves out there it opens the door for other people to be honest with themselves.
Honesty is the start to healing.
This last year has been a little tough. I’m so grateful for the writing process as it’s helped me work through so many things with God. There are many times when it’s strictly between God, myself and my journal. Other times God makes it clear it’s something I’m to share with you.
A year ago this month, August 2017, my health took a drastic turn south. I was running on a cup that had long since gone dry and was choking on the dust left behind.
God has so miraculously designed our bodies to work the way He intended for them to work. But so often we just grab the wheel and run it the way we want. Unfortunately, I ran mine right into the ground.
Health issues can often be a snowball effect.
What started out as endocrine/hormonal issues led to depression which led to weight gain which exasperated all the other issues. So I did what any rational person would do, right? I worked harder! (I really wish I could add a rolling eyes emoticon here!)
My body was trying desperately to tell me to slow down. Yet I fought it every step of the way! I figured if I could just work harder, try more and not let my body get the “upper hand” it all had to get better, right?
I put SO much pressure on myself not having a clue that what I was doing was adding to the problem!
Then to add insult to injury I went to several doctors and was told this was simply part of getting older and I better just get used to it. Not gonna lie, that sucked!!!
There’s a cool thing about our bodies though. God created them perfectly. [Tweet “We see the flaws but God knows and loves every hair on our head.”] He has made each one of us to reflect His wonderful handiwork.
I will praise You because I have been remarkably and wonderfully made. Your works are wonderful, and I know this very well. Psalm 139:14 (HCSB)
So when things are out of whack do we turn to Him for answers? I sure didn’t. I simply ran that much harder. There I was working out 2-3 hours a day on top of our daily ranch work, writing, household chores, youth ministry and life in general.
My body rebelled hardcore! [Tweet “God’s goodness is amazing even in the middle of our struggles.”]
I tried the doctor’s suggestions to support my tanked adrenals and endometriosis. They helped temporarily but there were to many side effects so I had to cycle them and the crash in between was miserable.
It’s not fun to admit that it took so long but I finally fell on my face and said God I have no idea what to do, please help!
Humble yourselves before the Lord, and He will exalt you. James 4:10
We’re so blessed to serve a loving and patient God.
It’s not the first time He’s patiently waited for me to come to my senses and run to Him. I’m not sure if it’ll be the last but I pray it’s quicker each time now!
In typical God fashion, He had the best plan for me all along. When I finally submitted my will and listened to God I got to participate in my own miracle!
My body needed rest.
My emotions needed rest.
My spirit needed rest.
They all needed rest and support – not the punishment I was doling out!
[Tweet “All the striving could never do for me what my great Healer longed to give me freely.”]
God provided the steps I needed to take towards wellness. I simply needed to be willing to not run ahead or lag behind.
What started as a journey to help my body get the support it needed has impacted every area of my life. I’m excited to see where God leads and share with you as I follow Him!
I’ve added a new page to share a little with you about what I’m doing to support my health. I don’t plan on changing the direction of the blog. But I can’t help but share a little about how God has blessed me so much through this journey! Check it out here.
Thank you for allowing me to bare my soul to you. It’s not always easy to share the less than stellar parts of your own life. I’ve lived a life of delayed obedience way to often in the past so when God says go, I’ll do it.
Even if it means doing it scared!
I’m sharing this post with several other blogger’s at these Faith Linkups. I encourage you to check them out. If this post resonates with you and feel it would help others please feel free to share. Easy to share buttons below.
I understand completely the things are between you and God, I carefully word things so no one knows who I’m talking about when giving an example. Work and rest and balance, that’s key. I’m almost convinced since He made day and night 12 hrs. that we need that much sleep, 18 hr.days and 6 hrs rest weren’t enough.
Take care of yourself, sweet friend! I’ve been right where you are and today, still, I battle the desire to keep pushing and going. I’ve never been one to sit idle or relax much. In some ways it is good to have that trait, yet without intentionally monitoring it and extreme self-discipline, we run our bodies straight into the ground! Praying for you! And thank you for being so honest. Your words encourage others in a great big way!
Thanks for sharing at #MomentsofHope! I always love seeing your hope-filled posts linked up there♥
Blessings and smiles,